How the heck am I really Feeling?

The first step in dealing with emotions is identifying what they are. Sounds easy right?

Well turns out these complex fast-moving signals moving around our body can be very confusing. 

 What is happening around us, our thoughts commentating inside our head and our overall internal body state, all play a role in determining what news story we come up with.

 Most people have a few top emotion words to describe their feeling state. Take anger for example. There are lots of descriptors that speak to the type and intensity of anger. For example, the words frustrated, grumpy, annoyed, offended, defensive all mean totally different things. Meaning helps provide a map of what the emotion is trying to tell you.

 Let’s look at some examples where knowing the level and type on anger could be useful for self-regulation and also reading other people emotions. Ever woken up in the morning feeling grumpy? Perhaps you didn’t sleep well or just aren’t a morning person. This is totally different to feeling offended that you weren’t invited to a friend’s birthday party. This intel can help you navigate what will help deal more effectively with your feeling state. 

 As you reflect on what your emotion is trying to tell you, your initial response may change. Perhaps your interpretation of events was clouded by past experiences, the fact that you felt stressed out and didn’t stop to notice what you were feeling and why.

 Strengthening your emotion naming vocabulary, is a self-regulation skill in itself. So, the next time you notice yourself having a reaction, dig a little deeper and ask yourself for more details.